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Aisya Rahman
Name's Aisya Rahman. My kampung yet glamorous nick is Esah. 21. Residing in SS2, Petaling Jaya. I can scribble anything anytime anywhere. Chances are you'd think that I'm a freak. You should know by now that I'm not the kind who cares.
Hakim and I pulled a BBQ session for Hadi last night. All of our friends came and they wrapped up all the food. Hakim was in charge of BBQ while I was in charge of cooking bihun. My baby helped me in the kitchen. It was a fun loving night I swear :)
I stayed awake from Saturday evening (please refer my Saturday's blog entry below to see what I did) til this morning 1am. I was everywhere doing everything. Imagine how tired I really was. Not sleeping for 2 days can drive a person mad.
I went to Levis Jeans Fit this morning. For 30 minutes job, they gave me RM250 Levis voucher. Now I can buy myself another pair of jeans.
I bought Nasi Ayam for lunch for my brothers. We cleaned up the house today.
I went out with Nadia at 3pm to McDonalds SS2.
It's raining outside. I feel relaxed. I miss this feeling..... :)
I wasted the first half of my Saturday, as usual. I woke up at 3pm, started texting my Suns whom I miss dearly. Lazed around the house for abit then got ready and left for Capsquare. Movie was full so all of us left to Ampang Park for karaoke. We sang for two hours, it was good. I lived life again. I once was so crazy about singing and performing. Really, no joke. Performing was a past hobby :)
After karaoke, we got crazier so the 5 of us left for Petaling Street in Dali's car. We didn't buy anything, we only wanted to play tourist :D
Dear male readers, if you don't know where to buy cheap gorgeous roses, you can get a bouquet of beautiful roses at the price of RM35 in Petaling Street. I wanted to buy a bouquet for myself because it was just so damn cheap... but I obviously didn't. The thought itself is rather pathetic. Sad case.
After Petaling Street, I went to Echa's house as she wanted to shower.
At midnight we left for MBO Ampang and watched 1245am's Santau. IT IS BY FAR THE SCARIEST MALAY MOVIE I HAVE EVER WATCHED! IT REALLY FREAKED ME OUT! CONGRATULATIONS DIRECTOR!
I practically had my shawl wrapped around my head throughout the movie. Bongs hid his head behind the chair in front. Echa had her feet crawled up most of the time. Gjah covered her face with her palm and peeked in between her fingers. Dali, Sumo and Mon watched bravely :p
We went to D'Kayu Petronas Ampang to watch football. I called Hadi who was in Hartamas and asked him to meet me at Eastin, was too scared to go home by myself. I was on the phone all the way to Eastin. I was really really scared.
Lesson learnt: To watch scary movie with bf and watch it near home, NOT somewhere far like MBO Ampang.
I find my Saturday really amusing. I hung out with my loved ones and we went to places that we would never think of visiting on a frigging Saturday. I had fun :)
It's almost 5am, I will be driving to LCCT with Hakim to send my maid off at 6am.. she's going back for good. Looks like there will be no more maid for the three Rahman's. Welcoming house chores with an open heart, RIGHT.
The three of us have been really independent in so many ways but never when it comes to cleaning up the house and doing chores. Hadi's in front of me at the moment and he's asking me to come up with a duty roster. I thought of drawing a house plan and mark public areas in red and our rooms in green. Red zone = NO MESS. Green zone = DO WHATEVER YOU WANT.
First of all, Al-fatihah to Sumo's mom who passed away yesterday morning. May her soul rest in peace. Hang in there baby, Fantastic Three will always be there for the Fourth Fantastic. Love you bro.
I haven't been updating my blog (as you can already see) for quite some time. The past two weeks had been exhausting. Nonetheless, it was an eye opener and a new experience for me. I was forced to grow up and shift into a new attitude in order to get things done. I am happy that today is Friday, it simply means that I can finally rest my head/heart at home without worrying about the workload as most of the jobs have already been done and completed.
I am not complaining, it's just that I have nobody to talk to other than Mama, I have to filter what I say even with her, I don't want to appear rude although my intention solely lies on expressing my thoughts and no other.
I can no longer write whatever I want in my blog, you will catch me from time to time writing sincerely from my heart (how to spot this: when there are lots of cussing happening in one sentence, what more the entire entry). I found out that people who matter, whether in personal or work life have been reading the entries in my blog. I have been considering of switching this blog to private reading, meaning by invitation only. But then that will defeat the purpose of having a blog ... what say you?
My life has been great, I cried few days ago at work and a number of my colleagues caught me being a crybaby. I got upset over a stupid thing - I shouldn't have allowed my ex-superior to destroy my hardwork and self-esteem but I did. Anyways, everything is solved now. No point being upset over that kind of person, I learnt my lesson :)
Attended Branding Conference with Hakim on Tuesday evening at KL Hilton. Keynote speaker: Tan Sri Lim Kok Wing in action.
At KL Hilton, Wednesday midnight with Hakim who helped out with Client's event preparation.
The event day itself on Wednesday at KL Hilton. It was a successful event!
Had lunch at Kudu today with Azfar and other colleagues.
I'm ready to go home now. I've printed my homework and will be working on it over the weekend. He won't be around for two days, I shall spend my weekend doing things that shall benefit me in the long run. If you noticed, I've slowed down on partying *pats self*. I haven't been going to gym as I've been going home late everyday for the past two weeks. I have gained weight, still suffering from bruxism and jerkiness while sleeping. Hmm, what else? Oh, I'm content too.
I have a new desk at work. From snail CPU to super fast CPU, from white old screen to flat screen woohooo.
New desk.
Have a great weekend guys. Make love not war, don't drink and drive. K?
I left office at 230pm today as I suffered from acidic tummy. Couldn't handle the pain anymore.
Hakim and I headed to KL Hilton at 530pm to attend Branding Conference conducted by Branding Association of Malaysia, sponsored by Mama, thank you Mummy. Speech given by Mr Lewre Lew or Lewre brand himself followed by keynote speaker, Professor Emiritus Tan Sri Dato Dr Lim Kok Wing.
You are your own brand. Brand yourself before others brand you. Have a stand.
The Conference ended at 1045pm. We went to the ballroom next door to help my Client who was preparing stuffs for their launch tomorrow morning.
I'm still here at the lounge, awaiting my Contractors. I'm damn sleepy and mu tummy is getting worst.
I couldn't get up this morning, was just physically and mentally drained. The rain didn't help at all! I was in Cyberjaya by 9am. Decided to sit down and discuss about ongoing jobs with Client instead of waiting and twitting in the car (meeting time: 930am). Spent the 30 minutes wisely.
A meeting was called upon to initiate damage control. I'm grateful to have understanding Clients. Obviously other things took place before we reached to a level of understanding, shall not state here what I had to go through.
This week had been a challenging week.. non-stop from Monday. I'm seriously tired.
I'm still at work now. My friends have been calling me, asking me what's the plan tonight. I'm not in the mood to party, I'm in the mood to get my work done, I want to see the final results. The results would be priceless!
Talk about workload. Account Executive cum Copywriter cum Designer cum Dispatch cum Cleaner cum Punching Bag.
We had an emergency meeting in the evening earlier, around 430pm. We got the things settled. As a Consultant, we did so many rounds of copy check, end result: my eyes are now sore, I'm about to go blind, literally.
I actually fell (in Malay known as jatuh tersungkur in case you're wondering, wasn't referring to falling in love k?) in front of my Client. Was running up the stairs, then I skipped a stair, I was floating in the air for split seconds and landed on my knees. I had to hold back the pain, didn't scream when all I felt like doing was to seriously scream my fucking lungs out, it was painful!
In less than two hours time, my Suns turns 23 :) By hook or by crook, I will be there for your birthday celebration, Suns. All of us (roughly 30pax) are going to Bentong tomorrow morning, departing at 8am to mandi sungai, celebrating Suns birthday in a healthy manner. Well, not so healthy tonight :p
ARGH! NAK BALIK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mama's treating me an awesome Spa session at Concorde Shah Alam on Sunday. She said I went the extra mile and worked hard this week :)
I will be going to Changkat straight from office. No choice. Don't feel like heading home, change and go back to Changkat. Gona lay low tonight.
What do you do when there's a pile of shit in front of you? Do you ignore it? Do you sweep it under the carpet which will smudge the area being swept at as the shit is sticky? Do you clean the mess up properly, make the area stainless with a touch of your Burberry perfume just so that people won't notice that previously there had been a pile of shit at that particular area?
It is a common thing to clean up after other people's mess, I think that's what makes a person stronger. It builds up character too. I now know where/when to stand firm and not let others fuck with me anymore. I know my stuff. You can point fingers at me (normally it's just index finger) but always remember, the remainder of four fingers is pointing back at you.
I wished I had more sleeping hours, I've been staying up late and waking up early for the past four days. I've been driving up and down Cyberjaya too on a daily basis. I will be going there again tomorrow at 930am for a meeting.
I had fun today, meeting impossible deadline is fun. I was out throughout the day with my designer, trying to get things done.
Dear Jen Sern, thank you so much for understanding me and heaps of thank yous for your help! You should apply and be my PA. Thank you for carrying my shitload of stuffs. Thank you for the Kit Kat too! Wah, so many thank you?
We were out for 5 hours, talk about meeting deadline huh.
I had one major breakdown yesterday. I cried while smoking at the stairs in my department. It's not that I can't handle the pressure and stress. Crying is just a form of expression - for me to vent things out. I felt alot better after that and continued working again.
Mama has been checking on me, making sure that I'm still breathing. Been BBM-ing with her lately. I've nobody to talk to. Am I not lucky to have her as my mother? A housewife/cook at home and the boss in the office, so much to learn from her.
Therefore, suck it in Aisya Rahman! Toughen up! You're a graduate of AsiaWorks remember .... O what the fuck, go for it anyways ♥
2 person said something:
yeay aisya !!!! that's the spirit, my girl !! fighting !!!!!
My Manager's last day is this Friday. I was the first who received the news, I think. I was printing my things on Monday and took a stack of printed things back to my desk without checking whether the things were mine or someone else's. Was going through the stack of paper, then the last piece was a resignation letter, attention to our ED.
People leave all the time. Reason I'm affected is because maybe this is my first real job that I searched on my own - without the help of Mama, I bound to feel attached with the people I work with. Losing my Manager simply means losing a mentor, she has helped and taught me lots of things. Regardless of people's perceptions of her, different people work in different ways, she has her ways, perhaps it ain't the gentlest of them all, but the point is - I LEARNT and GREW.
I've been doing follow ups on her account, nobody said her account was easy to handle, hence why all these while she has been handling it by herself - she's a superwoman.
Just last week I was complaining to myself about the lack of workload since most of my accounts' ongoing events and jobs are done and over with. Then came this shocking news on Monday. Here comes another bag of workload and responsibility. I'm not complaining, I'm actually beginning to get the hang of it. My fear is only one thing - not being able to cope up with her account and in the end, losing it.
I've been suffering from acidic tummy lately and at night, I suffer from sleep bruxism.. google it up... stress is the cause to these two.
Really?
My morale is very low, I've been arguing with myself, it's so hard to motivate this stubborn girl, seriously.
I woke up in the afternoon, very early. It rained heavily, definitely potong my mood to go out then I made a stand, I said I ain't gona waste my Sunday by lazying around again! I got ready and drove to Curve alone at 4pm. The bazar was a disappointment, not much stalls :( I got myself a pink scarve.
Bongs, Sumo and Nadia had already arrived in Kepong, so before I left Curve, I walked over to Ikea and bought a dozen of currypuffs for our kite session.
It rained while we were there but it didn't stop most of the kids and their parents to play kite. It was a beautiful scenery - huge green field, seeing colourful kites in the sky and family members helping each other out to kickstart the kite. I'm just glad Alia and Akan took the initiative to force our asses to get there ♥
After our kite session, we picnic until it was dark, 8pm to be exact. Then everyone left.
I had a good weekend, by myself and with friends. Once in awhile I got to remind myself that I still have friends who care for me, sayang kamu Suns and the lovebirds!
Pasukan layang-layang.
The both of us were laughing and screaming due to frustration - kite tak nak terbang.
Amilia came at about 1030pm. We were thinking of where to go while I was doing my hair, then suddenly the thought of driving up to PD hit me. I long for beach when I'm sad so PD sounded perfect and made sense to me. The both of us dropped by Brickfields for awhile -_- and left straight for PD at midnight.
Hitz had lovely R&B and Electro songs mixed together so you could imagine the both of us girls screaming and dancing to the songs played on the radio in the car. The adrenaline rush was to die for.
We lied by the beach, drinking and listening to the songs on my BB. We went down memory lane, from being friends since we were 13, college, boy trouble and life in general. We laughed most of the time and enjoyed being silly. The sound of the waves hitting the shores was just soothing and relaxing. I'm glad we went to PD, I needed the break.
We left the beach close to 4am. The both of us were very sleepy *obviously* so we slept at R&R Seremban for an hour.
As usual, only crazy fucks are awake at 7am. Been awake at this hour for two Sundays straight lol. Okay okay, today's an exception, I just got back. Give yourself a break, Esah .... I thought I just did.
To my bestest friend Amilia Murad, thank you for sticking by me, through thick and thin babygirl. Love you xxx.
title: I got a midnight bottle gona drink it down.
Seriously in need of major cheer up.
I've been moody eversince I watched Obsessed in Hakim's room. The story's about a psychotic PA, Lisa who's into her boss, Derek. Derek's married to Sharon (Beyonce) and they have a son by the name of Kyle. Lisa has been fantasizing and emphasizing on her discreet relationship with Derek when there's none to even begin with. Derek finds Lisa very sexy and seductive but didn't give in to temptation as he's very loyal towards Sharon. Lisa has been harassing Derek at work, been listening to Derek's conversation with Sharon and stalking Derek wherever he goes. One day, Lisa drugged Derek and claimed that she had sex with Derek. Derek woke up not remembering anything from the night before, the next thing he knew, Lisa came to the hotel where Derek was at while he was outstation and said to the receptionist that she was Derek's wife. Derek denied everything that happened, he said he never had the intention of wanting to be with Lisa - clearly nothing happened, so Lisa took pills and committed suicide .. she didn't die, that's the sad part, crazy psycho bitch.
Lisa succeeded in destroying Derek's marriage with Sharon .. well, almost. At the end of the movie, Sharon got her revenge, sweet!
I actually dragged my ass upstairs and changed to gym outfit. I felt angry after watching the movie. The same shit happened to my parents. There are skanks out there who are into rich married men, they are on the move 24/7 looking for an opening on an easy target - most men are an easy target, all these skanks have to do is just flaunt their boobs and thighs, that's all. Fucking easy, ain't it? If that's what it takes to get someone running for me, then I wouldn't pressure myself to keep on reading books and work so hard five times a week.
Fucking bullshit.
As you can see, I am still pissed.
I went to the gym, ran on the threadmill, lots of things were in my mind while I was running. I met Amilia at Piccadilly after gym, needed a shoulder to cry on. I went to HSBC and Maybank in Uptown after that. The machine printed six receipts in one transaction. I've paid all my bills ... I hate growing up.
I thought of hitting Changkat tonight with my Suns but my December resolution is to stop drinking and work out daily. I have been off booze for the past two weeks, I should keep on going and do whatever I can to get my mind off partying and substance.
I still have my midnight bottle, perhaps I'll just drink myself to sleep.
Unnecessary stress, seriously. I hate it when stupid things bug me.
I'm scared and scarred. I've hurt too many people and in return, karma has been hurting me too. I know I'm strong and I've got my AsiaWorks mantra to keep me alive, I just don't know why I'm being such a baby when it comes to these matters. In one second, life turns butt ugly. I'm in a mess, I'm ungrateful and I don't know why I enjoy whining, maybe because it feels good to be a victim so that nobody would point fingers at me, when truly, I deserve the blame.
ARRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Awaiting my girls to come my house, Si and Amil, where art thou? Come faster.
I know I am one day late, here's the overdue greet, to my Muslim readers, hope you guys had a beautiful Aidiladha celebration with your loved ones ... cos I sure did :)
I spent the day at Mama's place, refilling food and drinks, ensuring that the table is clean, washing dishes and entertaining my little cousins. After that, we visited Wan Wah. In the evening, I changed into a new baju kurung, took the LRT til Wangsa Maju and went beraya. Imagine, not only I had to pass 21 stations from Taman Bahagia to Wangsa Maju, I had to deal with the people and smell .... ergh *speaking from an Uptown girl point of view*. The long ride was worth it .....
My Raya was beautiful. In fact, this year's Rayas happened to be the best as compared to the last few years. I appreciate my family presence and affection more than ever now.
I went to Ampang last night to watch futsal. I read my Advertising bible while I was there and at the same time, I googled a couple of my Client's case studies on my BB. I surprised myself, I mean, thinking about work on a Friday night? I must have missed work and being busy.
Stayed up at night to eat maggi. Fell asleep til 2pm today, the alarm was supposed to ring at 7am, guess subconsciously my itchy fingers went and snoozed the alarm ..... expected.
I just had Tuna Pasta, yesterday's leftover from Mama's place .... yummy. Nothing beats my mother's cooking.
I have a couple of things lined up for today - all to be done for and by myself. First and foremost, salary is in. I'm gona watch my spending this time around, so much things to pay and save up for. Need to pay my Maxis and Celcom bills pronto, shucks. I think I'm gona get barred again, I'm about to exceed my credit limit very very soon.
I'm in the glassroom, surrounded by my two good looking brothers. One is working out, the other is jamming on the guitar. I'm blessed.
The chat that I had with Mama last night made me operate differently at work today. As a result of the chat, I completed 80% of pending jobs.
We had internal training again during lunch today, conducted by my GM. The topic was about "What Clients Expect From An Agency". Observing him during the training reminded me on why I actually joined the Agency - it was because of him. Fell in love with his speech and honesty during a conference at Matrade early this year.
Before I left work, I went to his room, wished him Selamat Hari Raya, Maaf Zahir Batin and cium his hands - the way I would treat my father. Almost shed tears though, emo kan? I miss my Daddy :(
Ditched gym tonight, argh!
Ohhhh guess what, I got my Twilight tickets already!!!!!!
title: I deserve somebody that will treat me right.
What's your comfort song? What song puts a smile on your face? What song ticks you off? What song makes you cry a river?
I'm lonely and hurt tonight. Letoya Luckett - Not Anymore is currently on my BB. I'm seated on the floor with a ciggy on my right hand as I type this.
It came and left too soon. It's unfair. Everything is unfair.
Can I have Mama next to me now? I need her to wipe my tears away and tell me that whatever I'm going through now is temporary and that everything will be okay when tomorrow comes.
Warning: This entry is not for the untrained minds.
Who would have thought that a five seconds crush that was developed on one fine night months ago would bring two souls together - emotionally and physically?
Who would have thought that I would have the ability to recognize him the minute we set eyes again for the second time?
Who would have thought that I would do the unthinkable by giving my name card to the wrong guy because I couldn't find him on that particular night, and few days later I ended up messaging him because that was all I ever wanted to do?
Who would have thought that the assholic period that I had to endure for the past two months would bring me to where I am today?
He has the qualities that I seek for in a partner. He makes me laugh, sometimes he makes me cry but in the end makes up for it by surprising me with a chocolate bar, pink cactus (can you imagine I actually received a plant as a gift, this happened last night though, thought it was super cute and sweet), and a I'm-Glam-bag which can be used for my trip to Langkawi. He says all the right things, holds me the way I want him to, kisses my forehead before we part. How can I not melt? How can I not fall head over heels in love with this guy, seriously?
Too good to be true don't you think? Sounds like typical buaya darat to me.
At this point, I am convinced that he is not that kind of guy. Even if he is, I would like the truth to unveil itself. That way I am able to beat the shit out of myself and say "See, I told you so".
No, dear God. He is a good man. I know he is. I love him and that's all I ever wanted to do - to love and be loved. I've been by myself for 14 years, I know how lonely life can be.
Tapi kalau tepuk sebelah tangan pun tak guna jugak.
I had Ayam Penyet for dinner last night with Bongs and Nadia. Haven't hung out with them for the longest time. We sat for 2 hours at Ayam Penyet discussing about Langkawi and latest hot goss.
After Penyet, I chilled at Nadia's place. We were semi-topless for awhile as we were comparing our beer belly - trust me it's ugly. Right after that, the both of us lied down on the floor and started doing situps, thought it was cute and funny :D
I left Nadia's place at 1045pm, drove like a maniac at Duke just so that I could join the Subang boys at Pasar TTDI. It rained on the way back so the boys switched venue to OK Mart PJ.
Since 14 baby ... now I'm 22. The things that you've done for me and family are the things that money can never buy. Love you very much Muhammad Nabil.
Happy birthday Nabilku!
November babies - incomplete without Aisyah Zaini.
babe! lol... why do u have to cover his face?? :P hahaha..ur so funny la..ouh ya,i bumped into tobeq at RASTA.tanya dia ada lepak with u tak kat devis.. n then he ajak lepak. i was at Envie that saturday nite..:)
Yesterday was my jalan-jalan carik pasal day. We went to One Utama in the evening. Thought of watching 2012 but as expected, all tickets were sold out so we settled for A Christmas Carol instead. Storyline wise - nothing to shout about but it definitely gave me that Christmas spirit and feeling.
After movie, we went to Uptown for dinner. I met Mayor and Nana there, saw Ayie's car, called him up, he was at the other corner of Uptown with Nabil and Aeffry. Tak sempat jumpa cos I had to feed my hungry tummy.
Watched football before going to bed, am no fan of footie but the role of a boyfriend is to instill footie spirit in girlfriend. Therefore, to dare is to do, come on hot spurs, 9-1 woohoo!
He got this for me due to my crankiness. Munched 70% of it while watching Spurs on TV.
Took a cab to KLCC this morning, was so effing lazy to drive, didn't feel like letting go of my parking spot in front of the office :D
title: Mom was right. You can't force someone to love you.
I wasted my Saturday by sleeping until almost 6pm. Typical me. I got ready and left for Zouk with Hakim at 715pm. Due to age restriction, Hakim couldn't enter Zouk *I forgot* so he left with my car.
The place wasn't even full, DJ Quest 2008 was better. I came to support two important people - Bo and Buyut. Both won; Buyut - 3rd place and Bo - 2nd place, congratulations!
After DJ Quest, he fetched me and we went to Changkat. I met Hakim at Baan with his friends. The place was empty when we were there. Half an hour later, I turned and saw all of my friends at the back table. Baan was then packed :)
My Subang boys arrived at 1ish, miss miss!
Nabil said "Esah cuba bayangkan kalau ada laki raba you kat sini, I rasa satu Baan bangun belasah dia". Tau takpe.
Left Baan at 3am, headed home and fell asleep while arguing. So not healthy. Grrr.
Only crazy fucks are awake at 7am on Sundays - example: myself. He left awhile ago.
A hoax email was circulated earlier stating that winter storm was going to hit KL between 7 to 8pm. It was a hoax alright. I saw and felt no snow.
It's Subi's pre-birthday party tonight at Rootz. I didn't want to go ....... but the offer(s) given by the birthday boy himself was something to consider, he managed to convince me to go and I almost said yes. Looks like I will be at home on a Friday night, again. Have fun, will see you at gym on Monday, you gota train my ass remember.
I played the electric guitar earlier. Now my fingers hurt. The frets are rusty, same goes with my fingers. Need time to actually polish my skills in guitars again. 5 years worth of practice went down the drain .. well not really, I can still play power chords, so it's all good *menjaga hati diri sendiri*.
Miss Aisyah Zaini, where art thou? I called your Momma and your sistah, all said you went out. I called your cellphone but it led me to miss-annoying-voicemail-your-call-has-been-forwarded-to-blabla. Please call me, kthx.
I sent an sms to Ayah in the evening, I said "Hi Ayah, how are you? I miss you". I was upset because he didn't reply, I thought he had forgotten about his first child. I came back home and called his cellphone but it went straight to his voicemail.
I seriously think it's voicemail day. The Government should do a public holiday on this, something similar with 1Malaysia concept. Now we have 16 September as public holiday - tribute to 1Malaysia but that's not the god damn point. Perhaps on this very special day, we all could switch off our cellphones, disconnect our landlines and drown ourselves in sorrows.
A few minutes later my daddy called me and told me to come over. He said he missed me. I grew up believing that I was his favourite little girl. Eventhough it's not true, I would like to hold on to that idea. Don't matter how many family and kids he has, I am his first child, ever, and I love him very much. Took me 14 years to forgive and love you. Imagine how long it would take for me to forgive the assholes who broke my heart.
Thought of going to Barsonic but all of my friends planned on staying in tonight as all of us will be attending DJ Quest at Zouk tomorrow to support Buyut or better known as Proxy *cewah* followed by Abang Krol's event at C&C. I will be meeting my Subang familia in Changkat tomorrow too, can't wait for the reunion.
Both my brothers are living the life of a youth, they are out attending their friends' birthday parties ... while I am at home, blogging .. as you can see and read.
Fuck fuck fuck is this how I plan on spending my Friday night? I need a hobby. I'm running out of ciggy, I have three sticks left damnit.
This cranky butch needs to shower and sleep. Or maybe, indulge herself in lots and lots of Sundae Chocolate. Aaah see, I think Miss Red is really coming.
When am I going to flaunt my new beau to you guys eh? Hmm.
HAH! Crankiness has been solved. He's fetching me soon, gona take me out for drinks and then watch him play ball. Hihi. Bye.
I didn't attend Alia's belated birthday dinner tonight at TGIF Pavilion as I am down with less than xx (insert amount) Ringgit in my bank account. I ditched gym too.
He came at 945pm, parking was an issue as pasar malam was taking place at the back of my house. On top of that, my brothers' friends' cars filled up the compound in front of our house gate. The both of us walked to the pasar malam, in hopes to find something to munch while watching DVD later. I ended up finding an imitation leather case for my Bold. At least now I can chuck my phone in my big ass handbag without worrying about it getting scratched. The sleeve that came together with the phone doesn't do justice, the top part isn't covered so chances of getting my phone scratched is very high - I have a lot of sharp objects in my working handbag.
Came back to my place and watched Bride Wars on DVD. He left at about 1230am. I snacked on Koko Krunch, hancur la diet ku.
Bedtime. Can't believe it's Friday already. So many events lined up this weekend. Don't know which one to go.
I went to the gym last night. I didn't procrastinate, I worked hard even without Subi around. I motivated myself, I should make this a habit in every aspect of my life .. zzz.
After gym, he came to pick me up and we had dinner in Uptown. Action speaks louder than words, I'm still learning on how to read body languages and facial expressions, definitely not an easy task.
I reached office 15 minutes before 9 today and managed to get parking in front of the office. Traffic was not bad.
I spent my lunch time reading Advertising book while smoking and sipping coffee. Didn't feel like having lunch, too much things on my shoulder, no appetite.
Mama paid my phone bills this morning. Will be paying her back when salary comes in end of this month.
MMSed him this picture.
Another reason to hit the guitar later. Another addiction.
I wasn't serious at the gym last night. I ran 6km last week, dropped to 4km on Monday and 2km yesterday. WTF? I worked on triceps and tummy only. I need new motivation, someone kindly post a fugly pic of me on Facebook please? That will work.
After gym, he came over and took me out for dinner. I left my 017 phone in my room and took my 012 with me. I was downstairs playing the guitar while waiting for him not knowing that he was already outside and he couldn't get through my 012 (damn you Celcom) so he called my 017 instead, obviously nobody answered. Free free kena marah :(
He spent the night with me til about 145am ♥
I woke up early this morning but arrived late due to massive traffic jam. From my house (SS2) to get to Tropicana Mall through the highway in front of KDU is 10 minutes. From that corner of Tropicana Mall to Eastin is 20 minutes. From Eastin to that curve entering Jalan Duta is another 20 minutes. Arghhhhh having to go through this traffic jam everyday can drive me nuts. Traffic wasn't like this when I first started in SA, don't know what the fuck's wrong with our drivers.
The freshies in the Agency had a very interesting training today during lunch conducted by our GM - or was it only interesting to the two servicing girls (Nisha and myself) as the topic was about The Evolution of Account Executives?
The key to falling in love and being committed to what you practice is by reading books covering the subject matter.
On the other hand, the key to falling in love is to find someone who allows you to be yourself, who butts head ever so often over petty things and in the end apologizes and makes up for his mistakes ... the list, my dear readers, is endless, you know the drill.
Cupid found me. I am thankful.
I have a feeling that Miss Red will visit me soon. No wonder I have pimples all over my face and have been craving funny funny things. Not forgetting being a cranky butch 247 .. am I not one already even without PMS visiting me?
Gym last night was a disappointment, maybe because Hakim decided to go hang out at mamak instead of accompanying me and Subi came pretty late. I needed a motivator, when I have one around me, I go the extra mile.
A trainer came up to me yesterday. After the conversation that I had with him, I worked on my muscles abit more and left the place, felt kinda shy having someone observing what I was doing. I have one pending session with him - next week, Tuesday, 9pm.
Guess what, Celcom barred me, I have exceeded my credit limit and when I checked my bill last night, it came up to RM400. Bill above RM150 is entitled to 30% discount so I hope when the actual bill comes to my place, it would be a figure near RM300 instead of RM400.
I waited for his call the entire night, he passed out apparently. I guess we have been spending too much time last week, kinda miss having him around .. hhhmmmm.
I was on my way back at 3am on Monday morning when the song below came on Mix.FM. It matched my feelings, been humming this song eversince. Came back home after work yesterday and figured the first two chords of the chorus on the guitar. My listening skills have gone rusty, can't go any further than two chords, shucks. Enjoy, my current addiction :)
When one speaks, why can't one speak loud and clear? Emphasize and pronounce each vocab, be brave when talking as it shows self confidence.
I cannot stand some people who speaks softly and unclear. No need lah to pull that horny kinky voice during daylight. Unnecessary, seriously.
This morning while I was doing my hair, I noticed that the length of my fringe has reached my chin. My itchy hand decided to search for scissors, the bad thing is that my hand found a hot pink scissors somewhere in the plastic bag on my desk, grrrr. Guess what I did .......
My fringe is no longer cool.
My GM was the first one who saw my new bangs, he asked "What happened?". Huwaaaa!
Next time Esah, leave the styling part to stylists.
1. I speak soft. Yes, all the time. 2. If your sister somehow manages to manifest herself into you, fill my shoes and she'll be fine. She'll just end up with bad hairdo due to some self styling haircut. 3. What doesn't kill you doesn't make you stronger. It just fails miserably.
hoi nas, u're my twin, u aren't supposed to laugh.
anas hazwan hasan, haven't seen u commenting in a VERY long time.
1. u speak soft mos def, but ur intention is NOT to seduce the person u're talking to 2. bet she'll be a superchick too, chances of her having bad hairdo is very high 3. i disagree with u. it made me stronger :)
I am physically tired but my mind is still running actively. Hence why I am still awake.
Currently smoking my lungs away while sipping chocolate milk, hoping that after I finish this mug, I am able to rest this tired body and soul.
At this very moment, I have few role models running in my head. I always wonder how these bionic and super women are able to juggle things at one go - family, relationship, work and friendship.
Things have not been sailing smoothly on my end. Two nights ago, I spent almost an hour with Mama in the car talking about her relationship with Uncle and Ayah. As the eldest in the family, I remembered making a promise to myself. I said I am not going to allow anybody to hurt my Mama anymore. At this age, I am still unable to prevent Mama from getting hurt, I still see her crying from time to time. For what really? Where is justice when it's due?
Not just that, my personal relationship with others have gone haywire. I have not been talking to my little sister for the longest time and I miss her so much. I smsed her the other day and what did I get, not even a decent reply. I really hope that she would mature faster, I want her to get out and move on from that rebellious, fuck-the-world phase asap. Geez, she reminds me of ME which is scary. If what I said is true, then I know what she is capable of doing.
Another drama is that my baby brother broke up with the love of his life. I can see that he is sad, tried to cheer him up earlier by acting really blonde and stupid - danced like crazy in the glass room to elektro songs hoping that he'd feel better. Guess I just made things worst.
I hate seeing my loved ones sad and I hate it more when I'm unable to help in making them feel better.
Love is something that one cannot force. It is a natural feeling that passes by. If one is unable to achieve such feeling, then it is called lust. This is just my theory. Pardon me if I'm wrong.
Pain and I are inseparable, I'm used to it already. I just can't take it when I see them getting hurt as I know how depressed and painful life can be when such event takes place.
Sometimes I wish I own an island and a plane so that I can just fly away and hide when things go wrong. Enough of blogging, I'm going to bed.
My Friday and Saturday was great. On Friday, I followed him and friends to Boston. Lesson learnt: no Kenny for me next time. The taste is horrible, not to mention that it's watered down. After that, we had late dinner at Uptown.
On Saturday, I slept til late in the evening, roughly 7pm lol, wasted my Saturday. He came back after a football match then he accompanied me to do groceries shopping at Tesco Curve. I miss that feeling, snuggling while shopping :D Followed by dinner at Uptown.
We stayed in last night and watched DVD, not forgetting getting ourselves into a fight til 5am grrr.
Woke up at 1pm today. Was supposed to go to Putrajaya, thank God I rang Kak Uz first. She was in PJ lol, it was a short drive from my place to her parents' crib.
I met Raja Arman who was born on 6 November 2009, we Scorpios rock kan ;)
Meet Raja Arman <3
Took a train from Paramount to Pasar Seni. I indulged in Sundae Choc while waiting for Bongs at McDonalds. We were like tourists snapping away pictures for Bongs' assignment. The both of us conversed in Indonesia while we were there just for the sake of playing the roles of tourists haha!
Went to Ayam Penyet after that, Nadia joined. She dropped me off at Keramat LRT.
I am in the train at the moment, filled with all sorts of people and smell.
Took me 14 years to forgive and love you. Heh. Sorry, just a random feeling, needed to let it out.
Nonetheless, I miss you. Wished you were next to me so that you could wipe my tears away. I hate feeling broken and lonely.
"Happiness doesn't take place everyday and it only lasts for a short period of time. Therefore, enjoy the moment while it lasts".
I am drawn to mental masturbation. I can link one event to another. My imagination goes wild when I'm high, during those times I wished I had a pen and paper with me so that I could read my thoughts back when I recover. I'm not encouraging you to pick up bad habits, I'm just saying that allowing one's mind to masturbate gives room for creativity to grow .... this applies only if you're into creativity.
I watched Harold & Kumar, the second one, not the first one (journey to White Castle) on DVD. I felt at ease and safe. I felt that for once, I can just camp in front of the TV with someone I care so much about and spend the night in his arms. Good feeling.
A guy I met at my Client's open house two days ago came over to my office to pass the pictures of me that he took during the event. Before he left, he actually gave me this ....
Sweet! Limited space at my desk. Gave my Creative Group Head :)
mia2die4, at
December 4, 2009 1:30 AM
Aisya Rahman, at
December 4, 2009 11:07 PM
